The Backword 2023 Teacher March Madness Recap

The Final bracket.

The Final bracket.

Allderdice’s greatest competition, Teacher March Madness, returned last month. 

Pre Tournament

The Backword’s Pick:

Ms. Henze

Top 5 Best Odds to Win (via Caesars Sportsbook):

  1. (1) Ms. Henze (-3000)
  2. (1) Mr. Cuda (-1000)
  3. (1) Mr. Isaac (-850)
  4. (1) Ms. Kramer (-450)
  5. (2) Mr. Rhad (-200)

Top 5 Worst Odds to Win (via Caesars Sportsbook):

  1. (15) Mr. Battaglia (+36000)
  2. (16) Mr. Schaltenbrand(+41000)
  3. (16) Mr. Slosky (+47000)
  4. (16) Mrs. Provance(+60000)
  5. (16) Mr. Lee (+100000)


Player(s) of the Round: 

(16) Mr. Lee and (6) Mr. O’Brien (Tied with 295 votes)

Upset of the Round: 

(16) Mr. Schaltenbrand over (1) Ms. Henze

Postgame Reactions:

Mr. Scheuring on losing to his wife Mrs. Scheuring: “Students and I see eye to eye, I admit she’s the cooler Scheuering and they agree.”

Ms. McClelland on her stunning first-round exit, “It was a totally unfair matchup. I’m still the best chem teacher. It should have been a best-dressed tournament because then I would have easily won.”

Player of the Round:

(13) Mrs. Scheuering (350 votes)

Upset of the Round: 

(16) Mr. Slosky over (9) Straussman in OT

Postgame Reactions:

Mr. Parker, the sponsor of The Backword, on his loss to Mr. Battaglia: “I didn’t have an answer for his zone. I’ll go back and see what positives we can take out of this; right now it doesn’t feel so positive.”

Dr. Slifkin refused to comment on his blowout loss to Mrs. Scheuering.


Player of the Round:

(15) Señor Taylor (215 votes)

Upset of the Round: 

(14) Mrs. Price over (7) Mcgonagle


Player of the Round: 

(16) Mr. Lee (270 Votes)

Upset of the Round: 

(16) Mr. Lee over (6) O’Brien


Player of the Round:

(16) Mr. Lee

Postgame Reactions:

Mr. Slosky was unable to comment on his devastating loss to Mrs. Scheuering. However, according to a source that wishes to remain anonymous, he kicked off his offseason quickly, as he was seen golfing in Myrtle Beach just hours after his defeat.


(16) Mr. Lee

AP Music Theory Teacher and Band Director

1, 362 Total Votes


(13) Mrs. Scheuering

Health and Physical Education Teacher and Swim Coach

1, 312 Total Votes Earned


Lee: 329

Scheureing: 371

In the matchup of the century, Mrs. Scheuering ultimately prevailed. Mr. Lee appeared to take an early lead in the game until several reports of voter fraud were discovered. It was brought to our attention due to a mass of voters with suspiciously brand new and not-so-subtly named Instagram accounts. Here at The Backword, we promise nothing but the most real and nonpartisan truth. Fraud and rigging of any kind are not to be tolerated. Following the removal of the fraudulent votes, the true voice of the students prevailed, crowning Mrs. Scheuering champion and Allderdice’s best teacher.

On her close victory, Mrs. Scheuering said, “To be the man, you gotta beat the man!” Meanwhile, in response to his defeat, Mr. Lee said, “ President Nixon once said, ‘You must never be satisfied with losing. You must get angry, terribly angry, about losing.’ So I am terribly angry.”

Several of Mr. Lee’s supporters shared his anger, with claims that the accusations of voter fraud were false. Despite Lee condemning these claims, his supporters raged on and their anger finally boiled over when late on the night of March 31s they stormed the offices of The Backword in search of what one band kid called “lost votes.” On their second failed attempt to rig the voting, Mr. Parker said, “They left the room a mess. Many of the early editions of The Backword from the 1960s were crumpled up and soaked in band kid tears.”

In the wake of their failed attack on The Backword, they continued to protest with chants of “count the votes!” When they finally realized there were no votes to be counted, they gave in to defeat and were left only to play mournful melodies on their trumpets and cellos.

Congratulations to Mrs. Scheuering on her victory! Make sure to follow @diceforeword for The Backword 2024 Allderdice Teacher March Madness!